Responding to Workplace Stress

Stressed Out

One of the more interesting things about writing this newsletter is the number of times people e-mail me directly in response. I love these e-mails – every one is way more personal than a comment and takes much more effort. Over time, I’ve realized that comments are mostly about broadcasting, and e-mails are often about personally connecting and sharing – usually for the greater good. Feel free to comment, of course, but if you would like to e-mail me, you can always do so at paul@billionminds.com.

In fact, your e-mails are the reason that this newsletter and the two preceding it have ended up being kind of a trilogy.

The first of the three was called The AI Mindset, and it dealt with a really interesting finding from our research into how people use AI: How you THINK about AI makes a huge difference in how effective you are with it.

Soon after I wrote that newsletter, I started to hear interesting and pretty personal stories from people who shared the stress response they have to AI – how they feel it’s reducing their wellbeing, particularly in the workplace. So I wrote AI Induced Stress to describe it, and suggest some high level solutions.

But then the next wave of e-mails came, and they were SO interesting – deep introspection about how this stress showed up, with quite a bit of detail. Honestly, I wasn’t sure what to do about it – a lot of this was shared in confidence.

But when I took a step back, I realized that these individual stories were illustrating something that is well known, but still very interesting. Workplace stress is very common, but the way people respond TO workplace stress is very individualistic.

From the Specific to the General

Given the individual nature of stress responses, the obvious next question is whether there are any general approaches that can help people deal with them. After many years of working with people to help them maximise their human potential at BillionMinds, we are sure the answer is yes.

The approach we use consists of two steps to be performed when work related stress is low, and one to be performed when it is high.

Step one is to analyze the response that typically does kick in when stress is high – not just what you feel, but what you tend to DO. Typically these will be default or core behaviors that have had some success in the past, even if they seem destructive.

Step two is to deepen understanding by analyzing the impact those behaviors have on you and others. Some may be negative, but some also may be positive. Typically your response will have a mix of positive and negative impacts, even if that mix is not easy to see at first glance.

And step three is to find ways to quickly challenge your stress response, ways that will remind yourself that you do not HAVE to respond to stress in the way you currently are.

Making it Real

This can sound a bit esoteric, so to make it more real I’ll show these steps using myself as an example. I don’t mind admitting that my personal response to stress is pretty ironic, given that BillionMinds helps employees become sustainably effective built on a foundation of wellbeing.

Step One (Response Analysis): When I’m highly stressed at work three things happen almost right away if they are unchecked: 1) I go into extreme overwork mode, working late nights and weekends, and feel guilty for every minute I’m not working 2) I hyper-focus on work, shutting out almost anything that is not work related and 3) I shut down almost every emotion (aside form the aforementioned guilt), turning myself into a poor approximation of a computer.

Step Two (Impact Analysis): If you are my manager, you may perceive a strong positive to this behavior. After all, when things are tough, I double-down on work, and shut out almost everything else until things are resolved. I’m that classic employee who “goes the extra mile and comes through in the clutch”. In fact over the years I’ve got a few bonuses specifically because of that.

But the reality is a lot more complicated than this. My default of “working harder” means I miss ways to work smarter, and eventually I get so tired that I miss small details. My hyper-focus on the work in front of me means I often miss alternate and innovative solutions, particularly solutions involving other people, and my shutting down of emotion means I’m not available for colleagues, friends or even family at these times. And I do all of that to the detriment of my long term health.

Step Three: (Challenge Approach). For me this is very simple. When I start to exhibit these behaviors I pause for less than two minutes and watch one of our own BillionMinds videos – specifically this one on working smarter while working harder.

Does it always work? Absolutely not, but it does at least make sure that I start to engage my conscious brain, and look for some effective ways I can delegate, or find sensible shortcuts that will save me a few hours.

What’s Missing?

You might have noticed that at no time in describing this approach did I discuss diagnosing the root cause for it. In my case I do understand the root. It’s a complicated patchwork involving growing up in a family with a strong protestant work ethic, and a genius older brother that I could only keep up with by working ridiculously hard.

Getting to root cause, ideally with the help of a qualified medical professional, can be hugely helpful to truly help change stress related behaviors, but the key here is that even before you are ready for that, there are practical steps you can take to counteract your more extreme responses to workplace stress.